Tag: April Fool

Contrition

alysiaconstantineLeave a comment

Ok. I have just discovered that my last post did NOT depict my first non-veg dinner, but some strange cat-choking situation I’d saved from a hilarious book I found once. I truly do apologize for today’s mistaken posts. I do not seem to be able to get the hang of this stupid computer. I think today’s experiment in food and computers has convinced me that (a) my good old typewriter is the best idea for me and (b) I am going back to being a vegetarian.

Oh, and I’m going to stick to what I know best, which seems to be writing. At least, I do that better than computer stuff. In light of that, I’m offering my contrition here, and the suggestion that you let me redeem myself in your eyes by reading my novel SWEET.

I swear I’ve got the right photo this time–it’s the beautiful cover, designed by CB Messer.

You can get your copy of SWEET at Amazon, major bookstores everywhere, or (the best place) Interlude Press’ website, here: http://store.interludepress.com/collections/ebooks/products/sweet-by-alysia-constantine-multi-format-ebook

sweet cover
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AGAIN? Is this a JOKE?

alysiaconstantineLeave a comment

Ok, I owe the Internet some big apologies. My numerous attempts at posting my announcement today have failed badly. I’ve checked online resources, and can find no explanation for why the wrong photo keeps posting with my announcement. Once more, I shall try this announcement again:

I would like to announce that, after 26 years as a vegetarian, I am giving up “rabbit food” and eating “normal person food.” Please ignore my past statements about the moral, ethical, environmental, and economic reasons for being a vegetarian.

And please ignore my previous posts about this today–something is definitely wrong with my computer, and it keeps attaching the wrong photograph.  THIS post is, however, correct. I’ve included a photograph of what I ate for lunch today:

bitch better have money

Social Media Fails

alysiaconstantineLeave a comment

Many people have said that “old” people (I’m 45, geez! It’s not like I’m 46 or something!) should stay away from social media, or that women can’t work technology, or that half-Greek half-Irish middle-aged gay lady writer-professors are usually unskilled at computer and should stick to making Fruit Stripe Gum for the nation to enjoy (ok, I only heard that last one once, and it may have been a dream in which Andre the Giant and LeVar Burton were lecturing me, but still…).

I am beginning to believe this, as I have failed several times to tweet/post correctly today. Here is a brief history of these failures, which I openly and bravely admit:

 

 

1 glasses2 cobblestone penis3 fab fingers4 catsink5 dirtydogchew6hotdogs7 scissors7 urabbit

However, I am going to keep trying today, so keep your fingers crossed for me.